What's the point of vegan 'fake meat'?


I'd never really thought about it until out for breakfast one morning with a friend. As I was about to tuck in to my vegetarian full English he leaned over. "Veggie sausages?" he asked. "What's that all about? If you're going to have sausages eat proper ones, that's what I say."

At the time I couldn't think of a smart enough answer other than, "Well, I like them!" Since I became a vegetarian I've relied on fake 'sausages' a lot, but it got me thinking. You can get a fake vegan version of anything these days - milk, cream, cheese, egg, or yogurt, ice cream and mayonnaise. You can even get vegan scampi, Caviart and 'fish' (for vegan fish and chips). But it's fake 'meat' that people seem to get worked up about most.

No one seemed to mind the old veggie burger, but then along came sausages, bacon, minced meat, nuggets, schnitzels and such like, too... Like, I mean, how dare they? The audacious imposters. To some, there's something ghoulish, creepy and dishonest about vegetables made to look like flesh.

Some of it is so convincing you can't tell the difference, yet even seasoned vegans resent food that's made to look and taste like meat. Modern vegan food has moved on from the seventies and vegetables are more than capable of standing on their own. In fact, it's never been easier to be veggie/ vegan. Specialist veggie/ vegan restaurants have really upped their game, as have mainstream restaurants, who finally seem to have woken up to the fact that more and more people are choosing to opt out of default meat-eating. If you know where to look on and offline for products and recipes being vegan isn't too difficult. Vegetables don't need to masquerade as meat.

Or do they? There are arguments for and against:

For:
they're good for making the transition from eating meat to going veggie/ vegan
they're convenient
they taste good in themselves
they are good at absorbing flavours/ seasonings
they're a good source of protein
anything that helps people eat less meat has to be a good idea
you're not eating animals

Against:
meat eaters say eating fake meat is hypocritical, having it both ways
fake meat is for people who miss meat, and not for hard-core vegans/ veggies
eating fake meat means veggies/ vegans are suppressing their subconscious meat cravings
fake meat is a cop-out and lazy, especially if served in restaurants (vegan food is more innovative these days)
eating fake meat keeps our tastebuds acclimatised to meat

But is it as simple as weighing up pros and cons? Quite apart from the fact that many so-called 'real' sausages and nuggets contain little meat anyway (I'd always prefer a 'fake' version in that case, even if I was a meat eater), sausages, while traditionally meat, are merely convenient, man made ways of preserving, storing, cooking and presenting food. Animals aren't born with 'sausages', burgers, nuggets or loaves, so it seems entirely feasible and reasonable that vegetables may be formed into the same shapes. If veg is only allowed in its original form, then so is meat. It works both ways.

If we can't have veggie sausages, we can't have Meat Loaf

If it's the idea of one thing pretending to be another that people object to, then it stands to reason that if we can't have fake meat we can't have fake anything. What if we were to reverse the argument? What if meat were to masquerade as veg? Heston Blumenthall specialises in such culinary tricks and illusions, yet no one seems to object.

Just as fake fur coats are seen as jolly good things I think the same is the case with fake meat. I shall continue to enjoy my fake sausages, mince and burgers. A full English brekkie isn't the same without them.

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